Monday, April 23, 2007


I really wish that people would take into consideration how their actions affect other people before they do them. You would think that people would learn from history, but obviously not in this case. It really frustrates me that it has not only affected their peers, but it also affects the youth…youth that looked up to them and youth that followed them in their footsteps. This past week it just hit me hard and brought back a lot of the pain and memories of years past with older leaders. The funny thing is that I, along with so many people, warned them yet they were too arrogant to listen and actually think that it could happen to them.
Lesson Learned: Pride comes before a fall

. . . and this fall took down more than just their self.
I know that everyone is human and we all make mistakes, but not like this one. As a leader in the church we are held to higher accountability and I just wish that they would take this seriously. I’m tired of the hypocrisy that goes along with being in the background or growing up as a P.K. My heart is starting to harden towards the church. Not just my church, but all churches. I know that every church has their own issues. From past experiences I found myself shut out from people that attend my church. I’ve finally started to slowly open the doors, but I’ve closed it once more. I just pray that my heart will not become hard towards God or the church for that matter. I don’t want to put a label on everyone just because of one person’s mistake, but it just seems like an ongoing occurrence within this department of the church that I’m sick of it.

Sunday, April 1, 2007

MUSIC~ It's therapy to the Soul

Why is it that music has such a control over emotions? No matter what emotional state I’m in, music can change it in an instant. I know exactly what song I should listen to when I start to feel an emotion coming on that can either encourage that emotion or kill it. At times it’s nice and at times I play it just to ask for the pain that has been hiding and I just need a place to let it out. I love how lyrics speak to me.
I was driving to church this morning and the song “Stand” by Rascal Flatts came on and it brought back so many memories of last year.
“Cuz when push comes to shove you taste what you’re made of. You might bend till you break cuz it's all you can take. On your knees you look up decide you've had enough.”
I felt so empowered and motivated as I reflected back on last year and how I’ve learned so much from it. I really did learn what I was made of from that year. I love how music not only speaks to me but it can remind me of the past. And again, sometimes that is a good thing and then there are those songs that you will never be able to listen to again cuz someone or something ruined it.

I just found a new artist, Jason Reeves, on myspace today and he is absolutely amazing. I encourage everyone to check him out. But anyways, I’ve been listening to him all afternoon as I sat at my computer and attempted the impossible of studying. Through all the emotions that have been overwhelming me this past week it took me into such place of contentment and satisfaction. I’m not too sure why since the lyrics didn’t mean anything to those emotions I dealt with. Needless to say, music is therapy to the soul. Through times of pain, frustration, anger, joy, and loss of hope there is music out that can grab a hold of me. Thank you God for music!